Clean Jokes About Words and Puns

If you like plays on words, puns and jokes about language, you've come to the right place. Come back daily to see which clean joke or pun we've chosen for the day.

Your Ad Here

Our Partners

Fun With Words!

— Puns, Language and Word Jokes —
Saturday, January 18, 2020

English System Conversions

  • Ratio of an igloo’s circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi
  • 2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital = 1 I.V. League
  • 2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton
  • 1 millionth mouthwash = 1 microscope
  • Speed of a tortoise breaking the sound barrier = Mach Turtle
  • Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knot-furlong
  • 365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it’s less filling = 1 lite year
  • 16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Sterling
  • Half of a large intestine = 1 semicolon
  • 1000 aches = 1 megahertz
  • Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram
  • Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower
  • Shortest distance between two jokes = A straight line
  • Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = bananosecond
  • A Half-Bath = 1 demijohn
  • 453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake
  • 1 million bicycles = 2 megacycles
  • 365.25 days = 1 unicycle
  • 1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 Fig Newton
  • 1000 grams of wet socks = 1 literhosen
  • 10 monologues = 5 dialogs
  • 5 dialogs = 1 decalog
  • 100 Senators = Not 1 decision
  • 1 million microphones = 1 megaphone
  • 2000 mockingbirds = two kilomockingbirds
  • 10 cards = 1 decacards
  • 1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche
  • 1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin
  • 10 rations = 1 decoration
  • 100 rations = 1 C-ration
  • 10 millipedes = 1 centipede
  • 3 1/3 tridents = 1 decadent
  • 2 monograms = 1 diagram
  • 8 nickels = 2 paradigms
  • 2 wharves = 1 paradox

Translate this Joke!

Powered by Babel Fish